Great Wolf Fun

Jessica, Satchel and I were in serious need of a vacation, so we took a short trip to Great Wolf Lodge on Thursday and Friday. For those who don't know what Great Wolf Lodge is, it's this huge resort built around a giant water park. The one here is in Grand Mound, which is about 20 miles south of Olympia right next to Centralia (there's a bunch of Great Wolf Lodges around the U.S.). It's expensive, but well worth it. We had a great time. We arrived Thursday afternoon, spent the night and left Friday evening. One of the good things about Great Wolf is, even though you can't check in until 4, you can start using the park at 1, and then even though you check out at 11, you can use the park until 9. Pretty good deal.
There's a lot more than just the water park, with a spa, an arcade, some kind of weird Dungeons and Dragons magic game, a lot of restaurants and an animatronic show throughout the day. So here's some thoughts/experiences from our trip:

• We left the house around 12:30, a little later than I wanted to but not bad. We made a stop for coffee and bagels, and a stop for gas, but otherwise were on our way. We'd been looking forward to this day for awhile so were excited.
• We shockingly didn't listen to any Beatles on the ride, nor did Satchel request any, which was just as shocking. Jessica told a great story about a lost little boy and a magic mouse that she made up. I really encourage her to write it, I think it's great.
• We arrived at about 2:30 to a packed parking lot, which gave Jessica some major hesitation (she's not the most patient person). I was surprised it was so busy on a Thursday in February. We went inside, and it's surprisingly dark, I guess to maintain a "lodge" feel. There's a lot of wood and animal statues around, pretty nice, but what you notice most are the kids. They are everywhere. The line was quite long to check in but moved pretty quick. Jess waited in line while Satchel and I walked around.
• We came upon this giant tree/clock tower thing in the middle of the lobby where they have the animatronic show and story time. At first Satch was afraid of the tree, which is kind of creepy (it has arms and eyes and all that) but he was OK after a minute. This is also where I get my first glimpse of Simon, this creepy animatronic kid with blonde hair hiding out in a fake tree trunk. He's one of the stars of the show and looks bizarre.
• We wander more and Satchel notices that a lot of the kids are running around with magic wands. They have this game where you can get these wands for $30 (and of course accesorize them with more crap for more money) and you can wander the resort (and I mean it's spread out everywhere, you could waste all day wandering around playing this game) like unlocking treasure chests, activating talking pictures, etc., etc. in search of some kind of quest to slay a dragon or something. It was nuts, so many kids (and some adults) were doing this thing. Satchel mentions several times that he wants a wand. I answer several times, "We'll see." After briefly discussing it, Jess and I decide to pass on the wand. Satch handles it well, surprisingly. It would be cool if it wasn't $30.
• We wander down a hall and see there's a Nestle convention going on. I briefly consider putting on one of the unclaimed nametags and trying to get some free stuff. But I couldn't figure out a good way to explain having Satchel with me, or that none of them knew who I was.
• Jess checks in finally and rejoins us. The animatronic show starts so we watch. The story is that Simon is lost and scared in the woods and the animals, including a moose, a racoon, an owl and a couple of squirrels, along with our Native American hero Yellow Feather, tell him "There's nothing to be scared of." In fact, they sing "There's nothing to be scared of" over and over, and it's clearly a ripoff of the Lion King's "Circle of Life." So now I've got "There's nothing to be scared of!" going through my head constantly. Besides watching Simon be creepy, the best part of the show is that one of the two squirrels, who are in a little hole in a tree (one in each tree) is broken, so all you can see is the top of his head and it looks like he's struggling so hard to get up and sing, but he can't quite make it.
• We had up to our room to see if we can get in (we can!). They give you these bracelets to wear and they do everything. They get you into the water park. You can charge anything to your account just by tapping the bar code. And they're your room key. It's pretty cool, though Satchel hates wearing them. We're on the fifth floor and it's a nice room. Nothing fancy, just two beds, a couch, refrigerator, which was nice, microwave, bathroom. They have much more elaborate rooms for a lot more money (this one was expensive enough) with like caves for kids to sleep in, bunk beds, etc. But the way I see it, I'm on vacation to do things, not spend time in my room, so as long as it has a bed and bathroom, I'm happy. I'm not spending more to feel like I'm sleeping in a cave.
• Each floor has a theme. Ours was the Twisted Woods. That pretty much just means there's weird looking trees painted on the walls.
• Satchel is most excited over the TV in the room "just like the one we have at home!" Jess is most excited by this safe in the room to store our valuables "I want one of these!" I'm most excited that there's two beds.
• I went down to the car to haul all of our stuff up. Amazing, especially when you have a kid, how much crap you take with you even when you're only going for a night. When I get back to the room, Satchel is under the covers watching the Cat in the Hat. I know we're not spending our time here watching TV.
• We get dressed in our swimming gear and head to the water park. You enter on the second floor, where the spa, the ice cream store, the arcade and a few other things are. As soon as you walk through the doors of the water park, you get punched in the head by humidity. It's like 85 degrees, but it's not uncomfortable after the initial shock.
• You walk up to a lifeguard, who measures kids to see what rides they can go on, and gives them a color-coded bracelet so that it's easy to see what they can go on. Satchel did not like having to wear a second bracelet. The lifeguard mentions that the Activity Pool is closed because of an "accident." Jess asks "What kind of accident?" The lifeguard searches for the right words. Jess helps her by saying, "Poop?" The lifeguard hesitantly answers yes. Nice.
• The water park has a number of different areas. There's a wave pool with like 3-foot high waves that goes out to about 5 1/2 feet (starts at zero height entry). It was my favorite part. There's the ill-fated Activity Pool, which has like floating beavers and basketball hoops and a lilly pad thing to climb across. It's probably around 5 1/2 feet too. There's a kids pool area with a bunch of little toys to climb on and spray, a couple of smaller water slides, that's shallow, only up to Sachel's waist or so. There's a big fort-type deal for bigger kids and adults (though Satch could have gone on it if he wanted, but he didn't). It's highlighted by this enormous bucket on the roof that drops about 10,000 gallons of water every five minutes, causing screams and squeals every time. We got nailed by it once. There's also a big water slide on the fort that Satch couldn't have gone on. There's a small hot tub that you have to be at least 8 to use. And there's a big inner tube slide (actually two slides) that starts very high up (they have a cool machine that moves inner tubes back up to the top). Satchel couldn't do that one, and we never did it, though it looked pretty fun.
• Our first stop was the wave pool. It's only been in the last four months or so that Satch has really gotten comfortable in the water and is OK with getting splashed in the face. That's good, because you're constantly getting splashed. The waves really move you around. They go for about 5 minutes, then stop for a few minutes, and then there's like a howl warning sound and they start again. It was a really fun pool, my favorite part. We went deep first and then hung out shallow where Satchel could stand and jump the waves and get nailed by them.
• A word about the lifeguards. There's about a million of them, and they are on top of it. I'm used to taking Satch to the Mountlake Terrace pool where the lifeguards look miserable. But at Great Wolf, they do not stop, they are on constant lookout, it's pretty impressive. We learned later that they are kept on their toes by having a doll periodically thrown into the water and then supervisors see how long it takes for it to get noticed. The one time we saw it happen, the lifeguard was all over it. You can tell that they are under constant supervision because they do not fool around, which is good.
• We walked toward the fort, and that's when we got nailed by the big water drop. It was pretty hard, but didn't hurt or anything, was just a big dump on your head (which sounds kinda gross). The rest of the fort just has spraying things, etc. (at least, around the perimeter. We didn't go into the fort).
• We went to the kiddie pool. Satchel went down one of the slides by himself, his first water slide, but he got a bunch of water in his mouth at the bottom because he forgets to close his mouth. When we asked how it went, he said, "Not so very good." He went down the other slides with us and it went better. There's a bunch of little boats with water cannons which is pretty fun. It was nice for Satchel because he could walk around, not worry much about getting run over by bigger kids and could climb up on things by himself.
• We walked over to the Activity Pool. It was both sad and disturbing seeing it empty and knowing why.
• We went back to the wave pool and were in it for a long time, mostly in the shallow end. It was a lot tougher being in the shallow end for me, having to sit and being constantly pushed around by the waves. Tough on my back, but worth it watching Satchel, who did great. They also have a big water fall umbrella thing that we went under.
• We notice there's a shadowy figure up in the window overlooking the water park. I think it's either the spirit of the Great Wolf, or Ned Johansson, assistant pool manager. One minute he's there, the next he's vanished. Jess also notices a man who she points out has enormous breasts. He never turned around for me to take a look.
• We head back up to our room to change our clothes (there are changing rooms at the water park too, along with several food stands and an apparel store). We then drive to Centralia for dinner at a Mexican place called Casa Ramos, which is clearly a former Azteca. How clearly? They use Azteca menus, napkins, etc. I mean, it says Azteca on them. Whatever, the food was good.
• Driving back to the resort, we see the moon and it is huge and full (that's what she said) and really amazing.
• Satchel puts on his Buzz Lightyear pajamens in anticipation of story time and we head out to check out the arcade. It's a cool arcade, nothing amazing. It's like Chuck E Cheese in that it gives out tickets for winning games. The coolest thing is Satchel's pajamas glow in the light. We play some Ski Ball, some other games. Satchel rides this little ice cream truck and is immediately surrounded by a bunch of middle eastern kids, just like you see on TV. It was like they came out of nowhere.
• We got to the ice cream shop, which smells delicious, and Satchel gets a chocolate ice cream cone. They're a little more expensive than a Baskin Robbins but not outrageous. They have a lot of different kinds of desserts, all of which looked good, none of which I got.
• We go down to the clock tower thing where the story time is and it's already filling up with kids in PJs. We get a good spot on the floor in front but pretty soon are totall surrounded by people. We sit through the same "There's nothing to be scared of" show. Then comes story time, where two people dressed as wolf cubs, Willy and Violet, are accompanied by a Pack Member (that's what the call the employees). Satchel wants nothing to do with Willy and Violet, so story time ends for us before it even starts.
• We got back up to our room and play hide and seek, which you can only play so much of in a hotel room. We also play Jenga and Ants in Your Pants. Good fun. We go to sleep about 9:45, earlier than I've been to sleep in a long, long time.
• I sleep terribly. The bed is just too soft and uncomfortable. I wake up at 6 with a sore back. I lie there until it's light enough to read. Jess and Satch wake up about 9:30 and both slept great.
• You do not go to Great Wolf Lodge to relax. There are just too many kids. It was before 8 that I heard them running up and down the hallway, yelling, etc. Didn't bother me, because I knew where I was staying, but if you're hoping to sleep in too late, it's going to be tough.
• After packing up, I took our stuff down to the car and meet Satchel and Jessica at the buffet, the only time we eat at the hotel. It was fairly mediocre, especially for vegetarians. But mediocre or not, I ate a lot. Waffels, a bunch of different kind of potatoes, bread, fruit. And kids are free if younger than 4, which Satch is for another few months, so that was good.
• The waitress tells us that the busiest times are Thanksgiving, New Year's and Spring Break. The slowest time is May.
• After eating, we go to the gift shop because we've told Satchel he can pick something out. Of course, he wants the first thing he sees. But eventually, we walk away with a wolf on a stick that bites when you pull a lever, and a Great Wolf Lodge toy semi truck. But he's in there forever.
• We then go back to the water park. We spend more time in the wave pool and the kiddie area. The activity pool is open, so we go in there and it's OK, Satch has fun sliding off of the floating toys and shooting some baskets. After a couple hours, we're sitting near the kiddie pool when they have to clear it out for another "accident." I feel bad for the lifeguard wearing rubber gloves and patrolling the water with a net. Around that time, Satch decides he's had enough of the water park. I would have liked to stay longer but he's the boss.
• Oh, I forgot. First we went back to the arcade to use up our remaining tokens. We win enough that Satch can get a couple of other toy cars.
• He also wants to use the photo booth, but wants the picture to be of just himself so we wait outside while he poses behind the curtain. They come out well. It costs $3.
• After the pool, we head back over to the dessert shop for another chocoate ice cream. Satchel is very disappointed he hasn't found a girlfriend, but the ice cream makes him forget it. Two women excitedly see the Scoop Spa, geared toward little girls (and only little girls, which is total BS). It's the kind of place that makes me a little nauseous, in a Toddlers and Tiaras kind of way, and I'm so thankful that I married a woman who also thinks it's ridiculous. They also have a Teen room with video games, music, TV, etc. I tell you one thing, if I'm paying for my kid to come to Great Wolf Lodge, he ain't spending his time in a dark room playing video games that he can do just as well at home. Absurdly, two of the channels were tuned to MSNBC and Fox News.
• Our trip is coming to an end, but not before I notice two things: One, a man dressed like Robin Hood, who I think is an employee but I'm not totally sure; and a couple, both large, the man kind of scary looking, walking around with magic wands and a guide book trying to slay the dragon, and being very serious about it. These aren't the only adults I see taking this game very seriously. Jess warns me not to take a picture of them for fear of me being beat up, but I can't help myself.
• Satch spends more time in the gift shop before we somehow coax him out of there. We exit Great Wolf Lodge, take a few last pictures outside and are on our way. But not before stopping in the nutrituous Taco Bell drive-thru for dinner.

So, if you've read this far, hopefully I conveyed that it's a busy, fun place to visit. Our only regret was that we didn't spend more time there. Next time we'll go for at least two nights. It's costly but worth it and should be even more fun as Satchel gets older. Let me know if you have any thoughts, opinions if you've visited, or questions.

A Few Thoughts

It's been quite awhile since I posted last. I intended to post regularly, but that's proven harder than I expected. Who knew a 3-year-old would consume so much of my time?
But, I'll try again to post more regularly. We'll see how that goes.
For now, just a few thoughts on this beautiful early Fall morning:

• The fact that the Mariners have decided to not pitch Felix Hernandez in the season-finale Sunday is the perfect stupid ending to a perfectly stupid season. What, now you're going to protect him from injury? Now? The point of sitting a guy down is to protect him from injury so you can use him in games that are meaningful. Well, the Mariners haven't had a meaningful game in, what, a month? Two months? Why didn't they sit him down then? But now, they're going to rescue him from another seven innings? Give me a break. It's almost enough to turn me off of the Mariners. But I'll be back in April, believing 2011 is the year they win it all. And you watch, Felix will blow out his arm in Spring Training and they'll go on and win the World Series with Doug Fister and Luke French leading the way. That'll make this decision look even more stupid. Stupid Mariners.
• Typically, I dislike women's basketball. It has nothing to do with being sexist, I have no issue at all with women playing sports. I don't like hockey or golf or auto racing either. I just have, in the past, found the product not entertaining at all. I do think that there are very good women basketball players. I used to really like watching the University of Washington women's games, back when Chris Gobrecht coached them and they were actually more successful than the UW men. Here's what I think my issue is: You can have a couple of bad men's teams playing and it can still be reasonably entertaining. You'll usually see a dunk or two, some generally entertaining moments. With a women's game, for me, you need two good teams for it to equal an entertaining game. One bad team can completely ruin the product because it will be so laughably one-sided and ugly that it makes you cringe. So, what's my point? I recently covered the Seattle Storm for the Tacoma News Tribune. Prior to that, I had paid very little attention to the WNBA. I just didn't care. I was aware the Storm was good year after year, that Lauren Jackson and Sue Bird were both good players. I just didn't care. But after covering them on their run to the WNBA title, they won me over. The quality of play was high and the atmosphere at KeyArena was as loud as I've been around. I mean, uncomfortably loud. I could still do without a lot of the ridiculous crowd-involvement things like the Stanky Dance, the conga line thing and the incredibly loud music, but that's true of a lot of sports. I will say that the Storm and Sounders do a great job engaging the fans, which I think is awesome. So, will I regularly follow the WNBA next season? No, probably not. But I also won't quickly turn away from a game when I see one, and I wouldn't mind going to a few games next season. It was the first time I actually had fun at a women's basketball game in a long, long time, so bravo Storm.
• I'm getting the feeling the Husky football team isn't going to a bowl game. I know, it's early. But yikes, can anyone here tackle? I don't blame the coach entirely, but Nick Holt is one of the highest paid assistant coaches in the country. Why can't his defense tackle? And it's not just the defense. I covered Jake Locker when he was a freshman at Ferndale High School. I've followed him since then. I've never seen him look worse than he did against Nebraska in any sport. It was shocking. Yes, he got bad blocking. But he's supposed to be one of the top five players in the country, and he completely tanked. And I hate that, because he's such a good guy, I want him to succeed. And I know he will. But wow was that bad. The Pac-10 is turning out to be a lot more competitive than we expected and I'm trying to add up Washington wins, but each time I try, I never come out with enough to send it to a bowl game. And what a disaster that would be.
• About a month ago we went to see the Sounders play the Chicago Fire and got to sit in the Nordstrom's suite. My aunt works for the Nordstroms (and I don't mean selling shoes) so now and then we get to take advantage of that. We've gotten their Diamond Club seats at Mariner games. We've gotten to use their summer house on one of the islands for a birthday. And when I say summer house, I mean summer compound, where there are like three different huge, ridiculously beautiful houses right on the water. We've gotten to watch July 4th fireworks from their downtown condo which is so big, I actually got lost walking around in it. ...seriously. So, the point is, we've been pretty lucky that my aunt has that connection. And watching a game from a suite is both fun and hard. Why hard? Because you get used to it, and soon (kinda like the Diamond Club), you don't want to watch a game from anywhere else. Free food and drinks, perfect, comfortable seats, free parking, and the ushers definitely treat you differently. I kept thinking, wait, you don't understand, I'm not a Nordstrom, you don't have to pretend I'm important. I knew it was a different world when, as we entered the stadium, we ran into Sounders majority owner Joe Roth, who used to be in charge of Disney. We don't see him much in the cheap seats. On the way out, we walked right next to Drew Carey (who looks really weird skinny) and, right behind him, Ryan Stiles. They were talking about going out after the game but both decided that they had to work in the morning so they wouldn't. My guess is their work was different from our work. Anyway, we're going to see the Sounders against Chivas of Guadalajara in a couple weeks and watching from the suite. I'll try to post something more extensive about that then.
• Alright, that's all I've got for now. This is long enough. But I'll try to update again sometime.

How'd We Get Here?

Today, August 8, 2010, is Jessica and my sixth wedding anniversary. I look outside and it's raining. That's way different than it was six years ago, when we had a beautiful day for our amazing wedding at Semiahmoo Resort in Birch Bay, by the Canadian border. A lot has changed since that day.

Since we got married, we've lived in four places. I've had four jobs, Jess has had five. We've owned a house, sold a house. We've lost two animals. We've had a lot of highs and a lot of lows. And we had Satchel, which is the most ridiculously amazing thing that has happened to us. In fact, I barely remember a day (nor do I care to) without him in our lives. That's been a wonderful change.

What hasn't changed in those six years is how much I love Jess. Yes, she snores. She farts. She drools. If she could, she'd sleep all day, every day. Patience is not her biggest strength. It's all part of what makes me love her.

She's also the most wonderful woman I've ever known. She's so beautiful, my heart races whenever I'm around her. She's so smart, I know I can go to her with any question I have, about anything (she'll at least sound like she knows what she's talking about). She's so funny, she might even be funnier than me! And she's an incredible mom.

She's changed me, and I'm so thankful. She's made me recognize and share my feelings. She's challenged me to think about what I think about. She stirs me to ask questions, to grow, to learn, rather than just glide by on who I've always been.

And if it wasn't for her, I would have never tried Indian food. So there's that, too.

Here's 10 things you may or may not know about Jessica:

1. She's a great cook. I love her enchiladas. She makes great breakfast burritos. About 10 years ago she made great potato poppers and promised me she'd make more. Still waiting.

2. She's an incredibly fast reader. I've never seen anyone get through books so quickly, though she admits she skims a lot. Her favorite books are historical novels.

3. She loves and hates scary movies. She loves the idea of going to them, and then spends the rest of the movie complaining about being there. But her favorite movie, I believe, is The Ghost and Mrs. Muir.

4. Her favorite song is Under Pressure. The Queen and David Bowie classic. But mostly she's into singer/songwriter things, like Nick Drake, Eva Cassidy, Patty Griffin, etc.

5. She's very competitive. I can't play video games with her. We played a wrestling video game in our early days of dating. I was just randomly pushing buttons but she insisted I was hiding moves from her. Eventually she just threw the controller at me. It's the last time we played video games against each other.

6. She has four tattoos. One just below the back of her neck. One on her foot. One on her ankle. And one on her thigh.

7. She gave birth to Satchel entirely naturally. No drugs, no nothing. It was pretty amazing. I know I don't have that kind of strength.

8. She's an incredibly impatient driver. She tailgates (though she says she doesn't). Any sign of any traffic causes her to huff, moan, complain. City living is not for her.

9. She says one word repeatedly during movies. "Jesus." But she says it in a hushed, "I can't believe it!" tone. I can count on her saying it about 10 times every movie.

10. She's very adventurous. We've white water rafted (she's a great boater). We've got hot-air-ballooning. Camping a lot (she's much better at setting up tents than me). She's water skiied, jet skiied. We've hiked. She's (usually) not afraid to try anything.

I've got a lot more I'll get to some time.

Jessica and I are an odd couple, though we're similar in a lot of ways too. She's the hippy, vegetarian chick, I'm the sullen sportswriter. No one would have really expected us to get together. I know she didn't. How do I know? She told me, from the beginning!

We met when we both worked at the Bellingham Herald, she as the newsroom receptionist, me as a sports writer. We said very little to each other for a long time, mostly because I said very little to anybody. But I always heard her laugh. She has a laugh that you can hear anywhere and it filled the newsroom and always lightened up the place. I recognized she was attractive but it took me awhile to make my smooth move.

So how did I do it? Stalking baby, stalking!

I would recognize when she was leaving - usually around 5 - and would strategically head out just ahead of her. One day maybe I'd be "looking" for something in my trunk. Another I'd be just steps ahead of her, knowing that she'd talk to me (her being friendly and all that). Maybe I'd be "heading" in from my car and run into her. You know, I'd change it up. She makes fun of me for it, but hey, it worked!

We started talking, then started hanging out a little, one day at her house the next at my tiny little one-bedroom apartment. We talked (she did most of the talking), ate, watched movies (look up Jimmy Fallon's song Idiot Boyfriend for a fairly accurate look at our early days). We went to a couple movies, including Amelie, which I would never, ever see, but went to because she wanted to. We went to Royal Tennenbaums, she fell asleep, I slyly put my hand on her leg, she stirred, I quickly removed hand.

We went out to eat at an Italian place in Bellingham. This is where, at one point, she said, "Oh my god! I could never date someone like you!" She said it jokingly, we laughed, but inside I died a slow, painful death. Though I knew she was wrong. And while she said that, we continued to be together, pretty much every day. She was housesitting at a farm she volunteered at near Christmas, and the morning I was driving down to Seattle for the holiday, I swung by very early while she was still asleep and left a large back of snacks on the doorstep. I'm very romantic. Then on the drive down I realized, hey, there's a lot of animals at that farm wandering around. Luckily, the treats made it to her.

I also made her an incredibly romantic dinner. At the time, I wasn't vegetarian, so I was a little at a loss, because I also wasn't a good cook. So what did I come up with? Boxed mashed potatoes, boxed stuffing, and frozen corn, baby! She took one look at it, laughed, and said, "Do you have enough carbs here?" But hey, it's the thought that counts, right?

One day we decided to take a day road-trip. I was so excited. I waited by my cell phone. And waited. And waited. She said she'd call. About 3 p.m., she finally called. I'd written the day off. Clearly, I didn't know her that well. Remember how I said she'd sleep all day if she could? 3 p.m.? That's nothing. So, we were on.

We got food, packed Dundee (our dog. ...well, her dog at the time) and headed out up a mountain that was still covered with snow. We got out and ran around in the snow and Jess fell. I laughed and kept right on heading to the car. She doesn't let me forget that.

We reached the top of the mountain and that was the first time we kissed. It was the most electric moment of my life, to know that she (at least kind of) felt about me the way I felt about her. My heart was going a hundred miles an hour, I was so excited. In fact, I nearly drove off the road on the way home. She asked me what I wanted between us. I said I'd like to date and see where it goes. She said, "OK, but nothing serious, and nothing exclusive." I agreed, though I knew I was serious, and she was the only person for me.

I did what I could to impress her. I shoveled horse crap at the farm she volunteered at. I mowed her ridiculously overgrown yard. I even became vegetarian! And even though she continually said nothing serious, we were together, exclusively, from that point.

Eventually, without us even discussing it, she moved into my one-bedroom apartment. Just, like, overnight, all of a sudden, there was all her stuff. So it was two people and four animals in this tiny apartment.

Eventually, yes, we moved to a house and got engaged. Our engagement was another smooth move by me.

We went to Las Vegas and I snuck the ring (which she knew we ordered but she didn't know I had) with us. When we got to our hotel (The Flamingo), Jess, predictably, fell asleep within about 10 seconds. I knew how deeply she slepts, so I called room service while sitting right next to her and asked if they could have the ring delivered. ...they said no (in retrospect, I should have just ordered something and then put it under there while she was asleep, but I was thrown off, alright?). Then I called the improv show they had going there, but they weren't cooperative either. So I fell back on Plan C, which was just doing it.

Later that night, we walked around the (actually) prety nice little garden area the hotel had. We were by the pools and I told her I had to go to the bathroom (but really, I wanted to get some flowers). So I wandered off, and of course, couldn't find flowers anywhere. Nothing was going my way. So I wandered back, and, of course, got lost (hey, it was a huge hotel!). I just wandered aimlessly for what seemed like about 48 hours and was finally about to just sit down, cry and yell "Jessie! Help!" when I accidentally found her. She said, "You got lost, didn't you?

I dropped to a knee, she thought I was hurt. Then I asked her, she looked a little stunned and then said yes. The oddyssey was over, and just beginning.

Our wedding was phenomenal, beautiful weather, a great turnout including almost all of my East Coast family. Jess looked amazing. So much fun. Then we had our best trip ever, our honeymoon in Puerto Vallarta. I swear if our animals weren't at home, we wouldn't have moved back.

So, that's the story of Jess and me, at least, on a somewhat abbreviated scale. I'm so lucky that she picked me, fell for my stalking ploy, stuck with me. She is truly the love of my life, the most beautiful, smartest and funniest woman and I don't know why she picked me, but I'm so glad she did, and I don't need an anniversary to remind me of that.

Seafair With Satchel

So Friday was the first day of the main Seafair event in Seattle and I decided to take Satchel to take in one of the city's most popular events.

For those who aren't from Seattle or who are oblivious to summer festivals, Seafair lasts pretty much the entire summer and is full of events throughout the city, from really fun weekend-long community parties to really lame local parades that mostly feature local politicians riding around in cars waving and getting heckled.

Traditionally, I haven't done much during Seafair that I didn't have to do. Now and then I went to the Greenwood Seafair Parade and this year I took Satchel to the Tour de Terrace, one of those community parties that is right in our backyard. As I said earlier, the parade was lame (and went on and on and on) but the carnival was fun and Satchel rode the Ferris Wheel, which was a surprise.

Seafair's big event is a weekend-long party in South Seattle that features the hydroplane boat races on Lake Washington and the air show featuring the Blue Angels. There's also the requisite fried food booths, give-aways and music. It's generally fun if a bit overdone.

I got my fill of the hydros/air show when I was a reporter for the Everett Herald and had to cover the three-day event. I hated covering the hydros. It wasn't that I'm against boat racing, though I find it fairly dumb. And I will say that the drivers are entertaining because they all seem to hate each other, which was always funny. It's just that the days are incredibly long with a ton of time where nothing is happening, the races are kind of hard to follow and understand and at the end of the day, you write and file your story and three hours later you find out that a boat committed some obscure rule violation and everything you wrote is wrong.

The air show is pretty good with some pretty daring moves, but you better really, really love the Top Gun soundtrack because you are going to hear it over and over, and once you've seen the air show once, you've seen it. Unfortunately, I was there all weekend and saw it about six or eight times. The people watching is pretty good too. I used to get there at around 7:30 in the morning and people would already be eating enormous heaps of curly fries and corn dogs. I wanted to tell them that just because corn dogs are available at 7:30 a.m. doesn't mean you actually have to eat them at that time. But whatever.

After a few years away from the festivities, I decided to check it out as a common citizen with no press pass, and took Satchel along for the ride. Friday there is no entrance fee so I figured that was the time to go. I told him all about it beforehand, that there would be airplanes and hydroplane boats that were cool, music, food and he could get an ice cream and maybe french fries. He seemed OK but definitely apprehensive because he hates loud noises and knows that planes are loud. But the night before we went, he happily said he'd be dreaming about the blue jets and the hydroplane boats.

The next day, all I heard was how much he didn't want to go. Oh brother.

Well, we went. He didn't like the fact that we went, but we went. We parked about 10 blocks away and genius that I am, I brought along a stroller. He almost never is in a stroller anymore but I knew I was going to be doing a lot of walking, and I knew that I wasn't carrying him the whole time.

Once we actually got there, he was in a good mood. We were walking faster than people were driving (there is a ton of traffic in that area on Seafair weekend) so he liked trying to catch up with police cars and tow trucks stuck in traffic.

We went through the gates and headed into the main area, where all the food booths and activities are. We were greeted with about a dozen booths devoted to the military, none of which we stopped by but it was entertaining watching civilians have pullup contests against Marines. I think Satchel was pretty enthralled by all the sights and sounds and it was nice that there were no planes or boats going at that point so he wasn't overwhelmed.

Our first stop was some kind of organic foods booth where they were giving away these granola bars that Satchel really likes. Then there was another booth that were giving away power bar type things so Satchel picked one that was peanut butter and jelly flavored and one that was cherry flavored. He took one bit of the PB&J one and handed it over to me. I didn't think it was that bad.

We walked ahead and saw that there were three hydros on display that people could take pictures with. Satchel actually wanted to do that, which was a surprise. He climbed up on the first one and then we got in line for the other two and he actually got to sit in the cockpit, which he really liked. It was pretty cool and a good start for us.

Then the day came to a screaming pause. Why?

LEGO.

There was an enormous LEGO exhibit that was really cool but sucked every kid within 10 miles of it into its trap like the tractor beam on the Death Star in Star Wars. It was like they were powerless to resist. It was so colorful and loud that you could not miss it. Satchel took a picture of an awesome LEGO Lion and was completely mesmerized by the exhibits they had behind glass. They were really cool.

I signed Satchel up for a free subscription to LEGO Magazine and he got a LEGO necklace and we played with LEGOs for awhile. I thought for sure we were going to be there all day. He got very upset that there were no LEGO "guys" to add to his creations but we worked through that. Even though there were about a trillion LEGO blocks out to play with, he desperately wanted to play with the ones behind the glass.

Shockingly, we left LEGO after about 20 minutes without any struggle and made our way over to a tent that was sponsored by Boeing and featured exhibits by local nerds who put together robots. They were actually pretty cool but Satchel was upset he couldn't actually play with them. Then I noticed they were giving away mini-airplanes so we got one and that gave him something to do for most of the rest of the day. He was really pumped being able to fly it around and I was pumped that he had something to distract him.

We walked around some more, checking out sights, none of which was super exciting. We did see a firetruck but Satchel didn't want to get close to it. He's weird that way. His entire life revolves around firefighting but when given the chance to interact with a firetruck or firefighter he wants nothing to do with it.

At that point we were hungry (and by we, I mean me) so we walked over to the food row to decide what we'd have. I knew being vegetarian that my options would be fairly limited and they were. So I got a cheese pizza and curly fries (the pile of which was absurdly big and felt like it weighed about 10 pounds) and we sat in the grass to watch the air show, which had just started. Satchel ate some of the pizza and fries and had his peanut butter and jelly sandwhich and apple juice that I brought. And he put on his earphones, the ones he uses to watch movies on the portable DVD player, that he used as ear muffs against the air plane noise. It seemed to work, as he didn't seem to be really bothered by the noise, and it was definitely a lot louder than I remembered it being. When he finished eating, he broke into what has become his common routine: breaking into a solo concert of Beatles songs. He was rocking out and, seemingly offended that more people weren't paying attention to him, sang louder and louder until people took notice.

After working through his songbook, we walked over to a Seattle Fire Department booth. It was pretty cool because there were air tanks, axes, masks, etc. Satchel was a little shy with the firefighter but I told the guy that firefighting was his life and the he knew everything there was to know about firefighting. That was enough to convince the firefighter to give Satchel a very special sticker and pencil to go along with the sticker badge that he got. I told Satchel only the bravest, coolest firefighters got the special stickers and he felt really jazzed up by that.

Then he wanted his ice cream. So we went to the Ben & Jerry's stand and he got a chocolate ice cream that he proceded to get all over his face, hands, legs, pants, shirt, along with my hands. It was dazzling to see all the spots that he managed to get ice cream. He was only able to eat some of it so I was forced to help him finish it.

We walked over to a spot where he could see the hydros, which were in their pits. He couldn't have cared less. He's an interesting guy. He doesn't care about the main things, but is fascinated by secondary things. Like, he didn't care about the hydros or the huge cranes there to lift them into the water. But he couldn't stop talking about the little patrol boat that was just puttering around. He didn't care about the fire trucks, the air planes, the soccer kicking contests. But he couldn't stop talking about the garbage on the ground and that garbage trucks would get to come and pick it up.

So, we never saw the hydros actually moving, and he didn't seem to care.

We kept walking around, mostly to move the curly fries through my system. There was one really cool air show guy who I'd seen before who does some pretty spectacular things, but he does it to his own soundtrack that he wrote and recorded himself and the songs were so stupid that it was distracting. But it was awesome seeing people rocking out to the songs so maybe I'm wrong.

At that point it was time to start the long walk back to the car. I decided to make a large pass around the LEGO exhibit and we walked through the crowd. We made one last stop, my favorite of the day. It was a free photo booth and though he didn't want to wait and was getting tired, he very patiently waited for me in line and he and I took a few pictures together, that we got on a magnet. I don't have all that many pictures of myself with him (I'm usually the one taking the pictures) so this was a great chance to get one and I was super excited by it. They came out great.

We treked to the car right as it was getting hot out and got to the car just as I was about to pass out. Which is just what Satchel did on the way home. That was two days in a row with a nap, which was shocking but good for him.

So, it was an awesome day. He had so much fun, was so brave with the loud noises and it's always so much fun to see him find new things and enjoy himself. We've had some rough days in the past few months as he tests bounderies but it's days like these that I can fall back on when he's losing his mind and throwing the world's best tantrum, and remember what a wonderful, fun, awesome son he is.

Mariners Trade History

OK, so I've been gone a month. Sorry. But I'm back, and I'll try to start posting a bit more regularly. So please keep checking back.
I'm picking things back up with a look back at the many trades, some good, mostly bad, that the Mariners have made through the years. It's a good time to do that, as the trade deadline just ended with Seattle trading pitcher Cliff Lee to the Rangers for a bunch of young players who we hope will develop well. I like the trade, I think Justin Smoak is going to be a great addition in a year or two, and hopefully one of the younger pitchers will develop. Lee had no future here, and if I have to chose between prospects or draft picks, give me the prospects.
So, here's a look back at the Mariners' trading history. Maybe it will jar some memories for you, or nightmares:
December 7, 1976: Grant Jackson traded to the Pirates for Craig Reynolds and Jimmy Sexton. The first real trade in Seattle history landed a starting shortstop who wasn't great but was steady, kind of an early-day Spike Owen.
March 30, 1977: Roy Thomas traded to the Astros for Larry Milbourne. This trade is only notable because it brought Milbourne to town, and he somehow kept ending up back with the Mariners, winning a lot of fans along the way despite not being all that good at baseball.
December 5, 1977: Jimmy Sexton traded to the Astros for Leon Roberts. Roberts turned into a solid bat in the middle of the order for the M's.
December 9, 1977: Dave Collins traded to the Reds for Shane Rawley. Collins was a great base stealer but Rawley was a bright young pickup for a team that was always on the lookout for pitching.
December 5, 1978: Tom McMillan, Rick Jones and Enrique Romo traded to the Pirates for Odell Jones, Mario Mendoza and Rafael Vazquez. Seattle actually traded for a guy (Mendoza) whose name is synonomous with being a bad hitter.
December 8, 1978: Craig Reynolds traded to the Astros for Floyd Bannister. The M's turned their starting shortstop into a young, locally-developed pitcher who struck out a lot of people and anchored the early M's pitching staff. Good trade amidst a sea of bad ones.
November 1, 1979: Ruppert Jones and Jim Lewis traded to the Yankees for Jim Beattie, Rick Anderson, Juan Beniquez and Jerry Narron. Jones was maybe the most popular of the early Mariners and it was sad to see him go. None of the guys acquired did much good, but Beattie lost a lot of games for Seattle.
October 29, 1980: Odell Jones traded to the Pirates for a Player to be Named Later (Larry Andersen). This is only noteworthy because Andersen was a fan favorite because he was good at practical jokes.
November 18, 1980: Larry Milbourne and a Player to be Named Later traded to the Astros for Brad Gulden and cash. What makes this trade so good is that the Player to be Named Later was Gulden, which means he was traded for himself.
December 12, 1980: Larry Cox, Rick Honeycutt, Willie Horton, Mario Mendoza and Leon Roberts traded to the Rangers for Steve Finch, Brian Allard, Rick Auerbach, Ken Clay, Jerry Don Gleaton and Richie Zisk. One of the biggest trades ever between two teams as it involved 11 players. Horton and Roberts were both good-hitting outfielders while the M's got Zisk, their best player during the early 80s.
March 7, 1981: Carlos Diaz traded to the Braves for Jeff Burroughs. I don't know who Carlos Diaz was. Burroughs at one point was a power hitter of note. But not when he came to Seattle. He did coach a Little League World Series champion with his son, though.
December 9, 1981: Dan Meyer traded to the A's for Rich Bordi. Bordi was a pointless pickup and Meyer, a solid outfielder for Seattle, never did anything after this trade. A wash.
December 11, 1981: Tom Paciorek traded to the White Sox for Rod Allen, Todd Cruz and Jim Essien. Few players have been as popular with Seattle as Paciorek, who was an all star and a pretty good hitter who has become a popular broadcaster. Cruz at least became a starter with the M's.
March 2, 1982: Player to be Named Later (Bud Black) traded to the Royals for Manny Castillo. Black was a local guy who turned into a pretty good pitcher for the Royals and is now a pretty good manager of the Padres. Castillo had a long career of being mediocre.
April 1, 1982: Shane Rawley traded to the Yankees for Bill Caudill, Gene Nelson and a Player to be Named Later (Bobby Brown). Seattle dealt Rawley for a couple of relievers, including Caudill, a hugely popular player with Seattle who was also a good closer on some terrible teams.
December 9, 1982: Rich Bordi traded to the A's for Steve Henderson. This would eventually throw the team into all kinds of chaos when they had both Steve and Dave Henderson on the team.
December 21, 1982: Ron Musselman traded to the Rangers for Pat Putnam. Putnam became the M's starting first baseman, and this was probably the only team he could have ever started for.
June 15, 1983: Julio Cruz traded to the White Sox for Tony Bernazard. Cruz was one of the most popular of the early Mariners, a fast, slick second baseman who was a fast, slick second baseman for the White Sox too. Bernazard was a good hitter before coming to Seattle, where he was not a good hitter.
November 21, 1983: Bill Caudill and Darrell Akerfelds traded to the A's for Bob Kearney and Dave Beard. A highly unpopular trade because the team dealt closer and ace jokester Caudill. There's never been a baseball player who looked more like a teacher than Kearney, and I think he did teach in the offseason if I recall one of his baseball cards correctly.
December 7, 1983: Tony Bernazard traded to the Indians for Jack Perconte and Gorman Thomas. Bernazard lasted six months with the team then was dealt for a pair of guys with awesome moustaches. Perconte was a fast little second baseman who seemed to hit a lot of foul balls in the area I always was sitting in. Thomas hit 32 homers for the M's one year and that was kind of different.
December 8, 1983: Bryan Clark traded to the Blue Jays for Barry Bonnell. Bonnell was a starter in Seattle but mostly I thought he looked a lot like Lon Chaney in Phantom of the Opera.
December 11, 1985: Ed Vande Berg traded to the Dodgers for Steve Yeager. Vande Berg was a reliever with a nice moustache. Yeager had been a decent catcher but by this trade he was old. I remember him hitting a big home run at one point, though, so that's good. He was also the nephew or cousin of ace pilot Chuck Yeager and I love The Right Stuff so that made him pretty cool to me.
December 12, 1985: Darnell Coles traded to the Tigers for Rich Monteleone. Coles was a young third baseman with power potential. You'd think they could've gotten more for him.
July 1, 1986: Player to be Named Later (Ivan Calderon) traded to the White Sox for Scott Bradley. Calderon turned into a power hitting outfielder that Seattle really could have used (he was later murdered!). I liked Bradley, a decent hitter who I modeled my batting stance after. But he wasn't worth Calderon, in retrospect. He's gone on to be a successful coach at Princeton, and his brother is the U.S. National Soccer Team coach.
August 19, 1986: Dave Henderson and Spike Owen traded to the Red Sox for Mike Trujillo, Mike Brown, Rey Quinones and John Christensen. A completely one-sided trade, and not in a good way. Henderson became an all-star and postseason star and Owen was a regular on successful Sox teams. Trujillo, Christensen and Brown were non-factors and Quinones was best known for being nuts and once not being able to pinch-hit because he was playing video games. He's also the only player I've ever gotten an autograph from. He muttered something I couldn't understand and then laughed gleefully.
December 10, 1986: Danny Tartabull and Rick Luecken traded to the Royals for Scott Bankhead, Mike Kingery and Steve Shields. Tartabull hit 43 home runs for Triple A Calgary and then 25 bombs as a rookie second baseman. That was all too much for the Mariners, who couldn't fathom having a player who had talent on the roster. Bankhead was an OK starter for Seattle and Kingery had a great arm in the outfield, but Tartabull had six seasons of at least 25 homers and five seasons of at least 100 RBI. And he was on Seinfeld!
December 10, 1986: Matt Young traded to the Dodgers for Mike Watters and Dennis Powell. Young was kind of a weird pitcher. He was horrible a lot, but also pretty good sometimes. At least he was something, unlike the two guys they got, who weren't.
July 11, 1987: Player to be Named Later (Dave Hartnett) traded to the Cubs for Gary Matthews. Matthews didn't do anything at all in his last big league season, but it allowed Rick Rizzs to constantly get to say, "There's Sarge!"
December 9, 1987: Phil Bradley and Tim Fortugno traded to the Phillies for Glenn Wilson, Mike Jackson and Dave Brundage. Bradley is probably the best left fielder this team has had, which is kind of sad, but in fairness he was pretty good. Wilson had recently driven in 100 runs for Philly but was awful in Seattle. But they did get The Thriller, who was one of my favorite pitchers, so it's not that bad.
December 9, 1987: Mike Morgan traded to the Orioles for Ken Dixon. Morgan was a serviceable pitcher, not good, but not horrible. He had to have something or he wouldn't have pitched for 12 Major League teams in his career. 12!
December 22, 1987: Lee Guetterman, Clay Parker and Wade Taylor to the Yankees for Henry Cotto and Steve Trout. Cotto was an OK player who could steal some bases and hit OK. Trout was horrible the few times he pitched. But at least none of the guys they gave up were worth much.
July 21, 1988: Ken Phelps traded to the Yankees for Jay Buhner, Troy Evers and Rich Balabon. One of the great trades in Seattle history and so well known it was referenced on Seinfeld. Phelps was a powerful DH/first baseman but did little after leaving Seattle, though he did break up Brian Holman's perfect game attempt with a two-out home run in the ninth inning once, which sucked. Buhner at the time was a 23-year-old strikeout machine, but developed into one of the most popular players in Seattle history and the backbone of the best Mariners teams ever.
July 22, 1988: Glenn Wilson traded to the Pirates for Darnell Coles. Three years after trading Coles, they brought him back. Two years later, they traded him again.
April 21, 1989: Bill Wilkinson and Rey Quinones traded to the Pirates for Mike Dunne, Mark Merchant and Mike Walker. The real accomplishment here was tracking down Quinones to tell him he was traded. Again, the guy was nuts!
May 25, 1989: Mark Langston and Mike Campbell traded to the Expos for Randy Johnson, Brian Holman and Gene Harris. I'll admit it, I cried, literally, when this trade happened. Langston was my favorite Mariner growing up and I was crushed when he was traded. I guess it turned out OK, though, as Holman was a quality starter for Seattle. Oh, and Johnson became the best pitcher in Seattle history and one of the greatest pitchers of all time. Johnson went on to beat Langston in the famous 1995 one-game AL West playoff win over the Angels.
January 24, 1990: Jim Presley traded to the Braves for Gary Eave and Ken Pennington. Presley was disliked by a lot of Mariners because he struck out so much but I always liked him because he hit a lot of home runs, which not many Mariners did at this point. I was disappointed when they traded him, and even more disappointed when they got two bad pitchers for him. M's fans might be shocked to learn that Presley went on to become a real, live major league hitting coach.
June 6, 1990: Mickey Brantley traded to the Brewers for Frank Bolick. Brantley looked like he might be the answer in left field but then stopped being good. Kind of like Bolick. Brantley once played in a charity basketball game at my high school, though.
May 17, 1991: Player to be Named Later (Jim Blueberg) traded to the Yankees for Mike Blowers. Seattle sent a nobody to New York for the former Huskies star, who went on to be one of the better third basemen the team has had and invented the Rally Fries!
December 11, 1991: Bill Swift, Mike Jackson and Dave Burba traded to the Giants for Kevin Mitchell and Mike Remlinger. This trade ruined Seattle's pitching staff for years. Swift went on to win 20 games, Jackson developed into a great reliever and Burba was a quality starter for years. Mitchell was even more insane than he was fat, and he was really fat. Once a great power hitter, he did nothing in his one season in Seattle but freak people out.
August 22, 1992: Sean Twitty traded to the Yankees for Tim Leary. The M's brought in Leary, who at one point was a good pitcher for the Dodgers but was well past his good days, and made that perfectly clear in Seattle.
November 17, 1992: Kevin Mitchell traded to the Reds for Norm Charlton. The Mitchell nightmare came to an end and Seattle got one of the Nasty Boys, who continued to be an effective reliever for Seattle and was very popular because he was nicknamed The Sherriff, and Seattleites love a good nickname.
June 27, 1993: Henry Cotto and Jeff Darwin traded to the Marlins for Dave Magadan. This was actually pretty awesome in its absurdity. Five months after this, Seattle traded Magadan - Lou Piniella's cousin or nephew or something - back to the Marlins for Darwin and cash. So essentially it was Cotto and Magadan for Darwin and cash.
November 2, 1993: Erik Hanson and Bret Boone traded to the Reds for Bobby Ayala and Dan Wilson. Hanson won 18 games for Seattle once but looked bad for awhile, but good again when he was traded. Boone, as expected, became a really good second baseman and was great for a couple years a decade later when he returned to Seattle. Ayala was the most hated Mariner ever, and that's got to count for something. Conversely, Wilson was the greatest catcher in Seattle history and one of the most beloved players the franchise ever had. Good trade for once!
December 10, 1993: Mike Hampton and Mike Felder traded to the Astros for Eric Anthony. Hampton developed into one of the top pitchers in baseball before becoming a vastly overpaid walking injury. Anthony had a few big power years for the Astros, but none for Seattle, another in a long line of that story for the M's.
December 20, 1993: Omar Vizquel traded to the Indians for Felix Fermin, Reggie Jefferson and cash. Little O was already a great defensive shortstop and learned how to hit for some great Cleveland teams on the way to an possible Hall of Fame career. Fermin never learned to hit and Jefferson never hit either, but at least Seattle got some cash out of this disaster.
May 15, 1995: Roger Salkeld traded to the Reds for Tim Belcher. Salkeld was a top prospect for about 20 years before Seattle finally traded him and he faded away. Belcher was the beginning of Seattle's moves that led to the AL West title. He was a steady, tough pitcher he was always pretty good, though he'll best be remembered for a meltdown he had after a game in which he karate chopped a cameraman.
May 21, 1995: Shawn Estes and Wilson Delgado traded to the Giants for Salomon Torres. Estes made an all star team two years after this trade. Torres retired for no reason.
July 7, 1995: Dave Fleming traded to the Royals for Bob Milacki. Fleming won 29 games in his first two seasons with the M's, and then did nothing after that, so even though Milacki was worthless, the trade worked out.
July 31, 1995: Marc Newfield and Ron Villone traded to the Padres for Andy Benes and a Player to be Named Later (Greg Keagle). Wait a minute. They did what? They actually traded for a star? This was the first time the Mariners actually acted like contenders, and it worked! Benes was one of the top pitchers in the National League and went 7-2 in Seattle, helping the team to the AL Championship Series. That's what a rent-a-player should do! Newfield never developed into anything and Villone just keeps finding work because he's a lefty, but has never been more than just a roster guy.
August 18, 1995: Player to be Named Later (Jim Converse) traded to the Royals for Vince Coleman. Coleman was one of the greatest base stealers ever and he gave Seattle a great threat at the top of the order on the run to the AL West title. Excellent, cheap pick up. He hit a home run on his birthday which just about made Rick Rizzs crap his pants.
December 7, 1995: Tino Martinez, Jeff Nelson and Jim Mecir traded to the Yankees for Sterling Hitchcock and Russ Davis. Tino was going to be too expensive to afford so the M's dealt him at his peak and he continued to be a great power hitter in the Bronx. Nelson kept coming back to Seattle but kept winning World Series in New York, and Mecir developed into a decent reliever. The M's had a chance to get Andy Pettitte in the deal but went with Hitchcock instead. Oops. He stunk. Davis actually hit over 20 home runs three times for Seattle but was a bad third baseman who reminded me a lot of Forest Gump. But he did hit the first home run in Safeco Field history.
December 18, 1995: Miguel Cairo and Bill Risley traded to the Blue Jays for Edwin Hurtado and Paul Menhart. I really liked Bill Risley, he threw hard and was a good reliever. But really, no one in this trade had much value. Cairo rejoined Seattle later in his career as a slow pinch-running specialist.
July 30, 1996: Darren Bragg traded to the Red Sox for Jamie Moyer. Probably the best trade the franchise has ever made, and it was pulled off by the same guy - Woody Woodward - who pulled off the worst trade the franchise has ever made. So you never know. Bragg was a nice young player but the M's had Jose Cruz Jr. coming up (or so we thought) and Bragg never did anything in his career, really. Moyer, of course, turned into one of the most amazing stories in baseball, still pitching at age 87. He was one of the top pitchers in Seattle history and did a ton for the community.
July 31, 1996: Desi Relaford traded to the Phillies for Terry Muholland. Mulholland had been a pretty good pitcher, even better than Moyer. So they got a pair of solid lefties to add to the rotation for a couple of prospects who didn't do anything. At the end of the season, they had to decide whether to keep Moyer or Mulholland, and went with Moyer. Good choice.
August 14, 1996: Roger Blanco traded to the Braves for Mark Whiten. "Hard-Hittin'" Whiten didn't do much hard hittin' in Seattle. Still, the guy did hit four home runs in one game once in his career, though not with Seattle. And Blanco didn't do anything ever. And it allowed Rick Rizzs to happily say Hard Hittin' a lot.
October 29, 1996: Chris Widger, Trey Moore and Matt Wagner traded to the Expos for Jeff Fassero and Alex Pacheco. Another move that I loved, as Fassero had been a top NL pitcher and in fairness, had a couple good years for the M's before falling apart. Pacheco is not the same Alex Pacheco who co-founded PETA. Widger returned to the M's later in his career.
September 13, 1996: David Arias traded to the Twins for Dave Hollins. At the time, it seemed a great move, trading a nobody minor leaguer for a solid third baseman. But Hollins' days of solidness were behind him, and Arias changed his last name to Ortiz, left the Twins for the Red Sox, got nicknamed Big Poppy and became one of the best hitters in baseball.
December 6, 1996: Sterling Hitchcock traded to the Padres for Scott Sanders. Hitchcock was a big disappointment in Seattle and had to be moved. There was some hope that Sanders would be better, but he was actually worse than Hitchcock, but whatever.
July 18, 1997: Carlos Villalobos, Dean Crow and Scott Sanders traded to the Tigers for Omar Olivares and Felipe Lira. At first there was optimism to get two pitchers who had actually pitched for another team and had to be better than anyone the M's had (well, except Randy). But then we found out Olivares and Lira were bad.
July 31, 1997: Derek Lowe and Jason Varitek traded to the Red Sox for Heathcliff Slocumb. Here it is everyone, the worst trade in Mariners history, and one of the worst in the history of baseball. Slocumb was coming off two-straight seasons of at least 30 saves, but had an ERA near 6 when the trade happened. He actually was pretty good for the rest of the season with Seattle, but was horrible in 1998. Lowe and Varitek went on to have five All-Star selections between them. Lowe was a top closer and a top starter for the Red Sox, though he'd shown little with Seattle. Varitek was a top prospect for the M's and went on to be one of the top catchers in baseball, and the Red Sox captain. What makes this really bad is that the Red Sox apparently asked for one or the other, and Woody Woodward said, "Nah, take both of them." Nice.
July 31, 1997: Jose Cruz, Jr. traded to the Blue Jays for Mike Timlin and Paul Spoljaric. The M's really, really wanted to improve their bullpen, dealing their top prospect for a pair of average relievers. Luckily, Cruz never really developed into a star, which is good, because Timlin and Spoljaric didn't do much either.
August 20, 1997: Joe Mays and Jeremy Palki traded to the Twins for Roberto Kelly. Kelly at one point was a fast, good-hitting outfielder. But that ship had sailed by the time he joined Seattle. Neither pitcher was a top prospect but Mays ended up winning 17 games for the Twins one year.
July 31, 1998: Randy Johnson traded to the Astros for Freddy Garcia, Carlos Guillen and a Player to be Named Later (John Halama). Yes, the team traded the best pitcher it ever had and he went on to continue to be ridiculously good. But he didn't want to be in Seattle anymore, and the team got back three good prospects who all developed, which rarely ever happens. Garcia turned into the ace the M's hoped he'd be, Guillen was a good-hitting, always-injured infielder and Halama was a useful lefty arm. A rare win-win.
August 31, 1998: Joey Cora traded to the Indians for David Bell. My nephew Travis cried when he found out Joey Cora got traded. I'm sure he's not the only one. Moms throughout the Puget Sound area were crushed when Joey was dealt. He was a good player best known for crying in the dugout, but I didn't cry when he was traded. Bell turned out to be a good player and Joey's career was pretty much over.
November 9, 1998: Paul Spoljaric traded to the Phillies for Mark Leiter. Leiter was best known as Al Leiter's way less talented brother. He did save 23 games the previous season but only pitched in two games for Seattle.
December 14, 1998: Leslie Brea traded to the Mets for Butch Huskey. Huskey looked like a guy who could hit about 100 home runs in a season but he wasn't, it turns out. In fact, he was traded less than a year later.
April 3, 1999: Bobby Ayala traded to the Expos for Jimmy Turman. For some M's fans, this is the greatest day in Mariner history, the day they got rid of the most hated player in franchise history. I never had much against Bobby, always thought he was better than people gave him credit for, at least, for awhile. But most people were shocked anyone gave anything to Seattle for him.
April 28, 1999: Two Players to be Named Later (Andy Van Hekken and Jerry Amador) traded to the Tigers for Brian Hunter. Hunter was a top base stealer and he stole a lot of bases in his one season in Seattle, and then went the way of every other potential left fielder the club ever had.
July 28, 1999: David Segui traded to the Blue Jays for Tom Davey and Steve Sinclair. Segui was a pretty good first baseman who ended up being on steroids and beat up Randy Johnson in the clubhouse. Davey was best known for being huge.
August 27, 1999: Jeff Fassero traded to the Rangers for a Player to be Named Later (Adrian Myers). They cashed out Fassero after two good years and he never did much after this. Which is as much as Myers did.
July 31, 2000: John Mabry and Tom Davey traded to the Padres for Al Martin. Neither Mabry nor Davey were worth anything, but this was still a disaster. Why? Because Martin couldn't hit and was crazy, inventing stories about his past that were easily refuted.
December 10, 2000: Ken Griffey, Jr. traded to the Reds for Mike Cameron, Brett Tomko, Antonio Perez and Jake Meyer. The day Seattle traded its greatest player ever. Griffey would not allow a trade to anyone but the Reds, so Seattle was limited in its options but you'd have thought they'd get more than this. Griffey had a couple good seasons for Cincinnati before his body fell apart. Cameron was a very good replacement, a great center fielder with power and speed and a great smile who made an all star team. Tomko stunk and Perez never developed.
December 11, 2001: Tom Lampkin, Brett Tomko and Ramon Vazquez traded to the Padres for Alex Arias, Ben Davis and Wascar Serrano. This is notable because of the six players in this trade, none of them were worth much of anything. Tomko pitched some in the bigs, Lampkin stuck around forever as a backup catcher and Vazquez was a backup infielder, same with Arias. Davis was the biggest name because he was a terribly failed No. 1 pick.
December 16, 2001: Brian Fuentes, Denny Stark and Jose Paniagua traded to the Rockies for Jeff Cirillo. I loved this trade when it was made and interviewed Cirillo shortly after it and he seemed like a good guy. But boy could he not hit in Seattle, odd since he was still in his prime and was a really good hitter. But for the M's he batted .234 with no power. Fuentes has gone on to be a quality closer.
January 25, 2002: David Bell traded to the Giants for Desi Relaford and cash. Seattle had just acquired Jeff Cirillo so had no real place for Bell, a solid third baseman and decent hitter who was never again as good as he was with Seattle. Relaford was worthless but the cash came in handy to pay for Cirillo's terribleness.
August 19, 2002: Derrick Van Dusen and Jermaine Clark traded to the Rangers for Ismael Valdez. Valdez had some success in the National League with the Dodgers but had no success with Seattle. Kind of like a latter day Tim Leary.
October 28, 2002: Lou Piniella and Antonio Perez traded to the Devil Rays for Randy Winn. OK, so Piniella wasn't really part of the trade but the trade was contingent on Piniella signing with the Rays, so essentially he was. Winn thought he was, because he openly complained about getting traded for a manager, even if it was the best manager in Mariners history. Winn was a good left fielder for a few years though.
August 6, 2003: Jeff Nelson traded to the Yankees for Armando Benitez. I kind of liked this trade because while I was a Nellie fan, I liked Benitez because he was huge and threw about 800 miles an hour or so. Plus, I figured Nellie would be back at some point anyway, and he was. Unfortunately, Benitez only pitched like 15 games and never got a save.
December 15, 2003: Gregg Colbrunn traded to the Diamondbacks for Quinton McCracken. This trade was pointless except that they got a guy named Quinton McCracken. What a great name. And I don't think he was even Irish.
January 6, 2004: Jeff Cirillo and Brian Sweeney traded to the Padres for Vince Faison, Wiki Gonzalez, Dave Hansen and Kevin Jarvis. The M's celebrated the new year by getting rid of Cirillo, one of the bigger busts in franchise history. No, none of the guys they got had much value but sometimes it's not what you get but what you get rid of.
January 8, 2004: Carlos Guillen traded to the Tigers for Ramon Santiago and Juan Gonzalez. The Mariners thought they had a trade for Omar Vizquel but that fell apart and then for some reason they traded Guillen, who was always hurt (he even had Mono) but could hit. He's continued to always be hurt, but really became a hitter in Detroit. Santiago played just 27 games for Seattle and then re-signed with Detroit. What's up with that? Gonzalez was not the MVP outfielder of the same name but a worthless middle infielder who never made the big leagues.
June 27, 2004: Freddy Garcia and Ben Davis traded to the White Sox for Miguel Olivo, Jeremy Reed and Mike Morse. I didn't mind this trade so much at the time even though I liked Freddy and he was a budding ace. He never did become much better than he was in Seattle, though. Unfortunately, none of the three prospects Seattle got - Olivo and Reed were highly rated at the time - did anything in Seattle. Reed kept being hyped as a really good hitter, but he wasn't. Olivo was, but Seattle didn't wait long enough for him and now he's an all star. Morse was the biggest shortstop I've ever seen.
August 31, 2004: Pat Borders traded to the Twins for B.J. Garbe. Borders was with the Mariners like five different times and was so old and worthless it was amazing anyone traded for him. But all the Twins gave up were Garbe, a former local prep star who never made it.
June 30, 2005: Randy Winn traded to the Giants for Jesse Foppert and Yorvit Torrealba. My wife loved Randy Winn, so this trade didn't tear me up too much. But if I take jealousy out of it, it was a bad trade as Winn was probably the best left fielder the team has had in the last decade or two. Torrealba was one in a string of bad Latino catchers Seattle traded for within like two weeks of each other.
November 29, 2005: Mike Blowers traded to the Dodgers for Miguel Cairo and Willis Otanez. Blowers never had the kind of success again he had in Seattle, where he was one of the streakiest hitters and hardest-throwing third basemen I've ever seen. But you'd think they could have gotten something more for him than two guys who never amounted to anything.
July 31, 2005: Miguel Olivo traded to the Padres for Nathanael Mateo and Miguel Ojeda. If only Seattle could have waited a little longer they might have seen that Olivo was actually good and worth having.
March 20, 2006: Matt Thornton traded to the White Sox for Joe Borchard. Thornton never really made it as a reliever for Seattle after being drafted so high. Of course, he went to Chicago and became one of the best set-up men in baseball and an all star. Borchard was a former Stanford quarterback who hit a lot of home runs for the Cardinal baseball team but hardly any as a pro.
June 30, 2006: Asdrubal Cabrera traded to the Indians for Eduardo Perez. Cabrera was a highly-regarded prospect and has developed into a highly-regarded middle infielder for Cleveland. Perez, the son of Hall of Famer Tony Perez, was worthless and was hosting Baseball Tonight on ESPN less than a year after this trade. That's not the sign of a good trade.
July 6, 2006: Eddie Guardado and cash traded to the Reds for Travis Chick. I loved Everyday Eddie. He was a good closer with terrible stuff but even more than that, he was the real leader of the team. But he was past his usefulness as J.J. Putz had emerged as the closer, so it made sense to trade him.
August 19, 2006: Jamie Moyer traded to the Phillies for Andrew Barb and Andy Baldwin. Who knew that Moyer would still be pitching in 2010? Barb and Baldwin did nothing in the Seattle system.
August 24, 2006: Shin-Soo Choo and Shawn Nottingham traded to the Indians for Ben Broussard. This seemed like a pretty good trade at the time, as Choo was stalled as a prospect and Broussard seemed poise to break out. Instead, Choo has become a star finally and Broussard retired to play guitar professionally.
December 7, 2006: Rafael Soriano traded to the Braves for Horacio Ramirez. Soriano was an overpower young reliever who once had dinner with my dad. But the M's decided they needed a starter, any starter, and traded a guy who has developed into an all-star closer for a horrible pitcher.
December 18, 2006: Chris Snelling and Emiliano Fruto traded to the Nationals for Jose Vidro. Snelling and Fruto were both not very good, though Seattle fans really liked Snelling because he was always willing to run full speed into an outfield fence and get hurt, and he was Australian. But wow was Vidro a horrible designated hitter. I thought this might turn out pretty good but boy was I wrong.
April 1, 2007: Travis Blackley traded to the Giants for Jason Ellison. Blackley was a top pitching prospect for like a decade before the team gave up on him. Ellison was best known for being good friends with Willie Bloomquist, the favorite player of every Mariner fan who knew nothing about baseball.
February 8, 2008: Adam Jones, George Sherrill, Chris Tillman, Tony Butler and Kam Mickolio traded to the Orioles for Erik Bedard. At the time I liked this trade, getting a No. 1 starter to team with Felix and Washburn. It turns out Bedard was one of the most fragile pitchers ever and a malcontent. Jones was the team's top prospect and developed into an all star, Sherrill became a solid closer and Tillman still is considered a good prospect. This was bad in every way.
May 27, 2008: Cha-Seung Baek traded to the Padres for Jared Wells. Baek was another in a long line of top pitching prospects who stunk until the team finally dealt them.
July 31, 2008: Arthur Rhodes traded to the Marlins for Gaby Hernandez. Rhodes was a popular reliever for several M's teams and is best known for his incredible hatred of Omar Vizquel. He made an all-star team this year at age 72!
December 11, 2008: J.J. Putz, Sean Green and Jeremy Reed traded to the Mets and Luis Valbuena traded to the Indians for Ezequiel Carrera, Maikel Cleto, Mike Carp, Endy Chavez, Aaron Heilman, Jason Vargas and Franklin Guttierez. Jack Zdurencik's first trade as M's GM was a big one and a great one. Putz was a closer on a team that didn't need one and hasn't been the same since being traded. Green is a dime a dozen. Chavez was valuable for a few months though Carp looks like he'll never fit with Seattle. But Vargas has been a huge surprise as a starter and Guttierez is probably the best player on the team other than Felix and Ichiro and is the future of this team.
January 28, 2009: Aaron Heilman traded to the Cubs for Ronny Cedeno and Garrett Olson. This trade was mostly noteable because Heilman was one of the few players to go to Mariners Fan Fest and then got traded like five minutes later.
July 10, 2009: Yuniesky Betancourt traded to the Royals for Danny Cortes and Derrick Saito. The fact that Seattle got anything for Yuni is amazing. The guy can't hit, and isn't a good shortstop. Cortes was KC's top pitching prospect and while he may not be that good, he might still develop some value, and even if he doesn't, who cares, they actually got something for Yuni!
July 29, 2009: Jeff Clement, Ronny Cedeno, Aaron Pribanic, Brett Lorin and Nathan Adcock traded to the Pirates for Jack Wilson and Ian Snell. Seattle finally gave up on Clement, a huge bust as a hitting prospect who was taken ahead of guys too painful for me to list. Wilson has continued to be a good defensive shortstop who can't hit and gets hurt a lot, and Snell continues to be a pitcher who throws hard and deals with mental health issues.
July 29, 2009: Wladimir Balentien traded to the Reds for Robert Manuel. The same day the M's gave up on Clement as a hitting prospect, they gave up on their other top hitting prospect, Balentien. Only in this deal, they got nothing back.
August 1, 2009: Jarrod Washburn traded to the Tigers for Luke French and Mauricio Robles. Washburn was having a great season and was a free agent at the end of the year, and there was a good chance he'd re-sign with Seattle. Of course, he didn't re-sign. French still has some potential and Robles is an exciting prospect so this could turn out to be pretty good.
December 16, 2009: Phillippe Aumont, Tyson Gillies and JC Ramirez traded to the Phillies for Cliff Lee. At the time it was amazing, the M's getting one of baseball's best pitchers to go along with Felix Hernandez. While Lee was awesome, the M's were horrible and they turned him into some other prospects from the Rangers. None of the three Seattle prospects traded to Philly are really developing into stars.
December 18, 2009: Carlos Silva traded to the Cubs for Milton Bradley. Don't let Silva's fast start fool you, he's still fat and bad. Bradley is still crazy and unfortunately, looks like he forgot how to hit. This trade is what many expected, one bad player dealt for another and both continue to be bad.
December 23, 2009: Brandon Morrow traded to the Blue Jays for Brandon League and Johermyn Chavez. No pitcher has been screwed up by their organization more than Morrow, who was never going to live down being picked ahead of former UW star Tim Lincecum, as stupid as the argument is. League is actually pretty good, but pretty inconsistent, and Chavez can hit home runs so there's some hope there. There better be, as Morrow is starting to look pretty good.
June 11, 2010: Cliff Lee traded to the Rangers for Justin Smoak, Blake Beaven, Josh Lueke and Matt Lawson. Lee was never going to stay with Seattle so the M's needed to get quality prospects for him. They did in Smoak, one of the top young power prospects in the game. Beaven has some potential but Lueke could turn out to be a disaster.
June 26, 2010: Ezequiel Carrera and Juan Diaz traded to the Indians for Russell Branyan. I didn't understand this trade and still don't. I like Branyan, but what was the point?

Are They Ghana Do It?

Is this the biggest day in the history of United States soccer? Hard to argue it. Never have more eyes been on the American team than today, when it faces Ghana in the first knockout round of the World Cup.
So will the U.S. rise to the occassion or crumple under the pressure of playing against the only African nation left standing after group play?
It's hard to believe the United States can top the drama it provided in the three games of group play. The lucky goal against England, the hard-fought comeback against Slovenia and the shocking last-minute goal against Algeria. Has any team provided more drama than the United States? I mean on the field, France.
Well, it might have to, as the crowd will certainly be with Ghana, which carries the hopes of the entire home continent. The United States does have the motivation of paying back the Black Stars for knocking it out of the 2006 Cup, but will that be enough?
For me, the biggest question besides how the Americans will react to having a crowd mostly against it will be how they recover from such arduous games over the last week. Bouncing back from the Algeria match just a few days ago is going to be quite a task, and reserves could play an even bigger role than they have so far.
I didn't think Ghana would get this far. In fact, I picked it last in the group. I didn't think the Black Stars could recover from the loss of superstar Michael Essien to injury before the tournament. Boy was I wrong. The Ghana defense, led by center back John Mensah, has been awesome, allowing just two goals. The midfield has allowed Ghana to control play as Kevin Prince-Boateng and Anthony Annan have really stepped up in place of Essien.
The good news for the United States is that Ghana has not been good on offense, as striker Asamoah Gyan has struggled to get much going and the attacking midfielders haven't been very creative. In fact, the only two goals Ghana has scored have come via penalty kick. For an American team that has struggled on the back line, that will be a welcome change. But the United States can't be complacent, as it only takes one breakdown for the very fast Ghana offense to score against a slower U.S. defense and get momentum.
A huge key will be the United States midfield, especially center mids Michael Bradley and Maurice Edu, who have to battle Ghana's mids for control of the ball and not allow any quick strikes coming from the midfield. If they can do that, that should free up Landon Donovan and Clint Dempsey on the wings to create and get into the box, really putting pressure on a Ghana back line that will have to focus on the tall, fast Jozy Altidore, who is right on the cusp of getting his first World Cup goal.
So, what will happen?
I think the U.S. midfield will rise to the occassion. I see Michael Bradley having a really strong game and making life tough on the Ghana mids. Landon Donovan's speed will give Ghana some trouble and they'll get sucked into stopping him, freeing up Jozy Altidore inside. Altidore will score his first goal today, putting the U.S. ahead early in the second half. After some scares on defense and more great play by Tim Howard, Clint Dempsey will break free on a counter and show off his creativity, netting a second goal for a 2-0 U.S. win.
Hopefully I'm right for once.

How'd I Do?

Group play is over in the 2010 World Cup and we're on to the one-and-done portion of our show. No more playing for a tie, because the winner moves on and the loser is out.
The group stage was shocking on a lot of fronts, most notably the incredible failures of France (I know, I know) and Italy. No one expected Spain to lose, but it did. People expected more from the African nations, but only one has moved on, which is too bad. And what about South America? Five teams qualify, five teams are still alive. That's really remarkable.
We've seen some thrilling games, a few great goals, some fabulous goalkeeping, and some really bad reffing.
All that is behind us now, though, as we move on to the most exciting part of the tournament. But, now's a good time to look back at my pre-tournament predictions and see how I did. ...it's not good. But I stand by what I write, so this is what I said, and what actually happened:

Group A
What I predicted: 1. France; 2. Uruguay; 3. Mexico; 4. South Africa
What happened: 1. Uruguay; 2. Mexico; 3. South Africa; 4. France
What was I thinking?: OK, I failed miserably here in picking France, but come on, did any of you really expect a failure of that magnitude? I mean, to the point where France wouldn't even practice? I know many of you thought I was nuts to pick them to go so far, and it turns out you were right, but I don't believe anyone quite expected that complete of a meltdown. So, yeah, France was a disaster. Uruguay, on the other hand, was not a disaster. It wasn't great, but it was good enough. It defended well, Diego Forlan was excellent and it showed that it's not a flashy team, but it's a pretty good one. Mexico had its struggles but took advantage of France's horribleness to claim the second spot ahead of a South Africa team that showed much better than I expected.

Group B
What I predicted: 1. Argentina; 2. Nigeria; 3. Greece; 4. South Korea.
What happened: 1. Argentina; 2. South Korea; 3. Greece; 4. Nigeria.
What was I thinking?: OK, so I was half right. Argentina looked very, very good, and I'm enjoying watching Maradona look like he's having fun, the only coach in the entire tournament to not look like he's headed to his funeral. Argentina is a definite contender as it attacks from everywhere and defends well. I was wrong about Nigeria, which was not as good as I'd hoped. It's too bad things didn't come together better for the Eagles because this was an opportunity to take a step forward, and it didn't happen. Greece was every bit as unentertaining as I expected but what about South Korea? They just run teams into the ground, which is kinda fun to watch. They have more talent than I thought and just keep working, and there's obviously something to be said for that, so congrats, good to see them make up for the 2006 disappointment.

Group C
What I predicted: 1. England; 2. United States; 3. Algeria; 4. Slovenia
What happened: 1. United States; 2. England; 3. Slovenia; 4. Algeria
What was I thinking: Turned out to be a more balanced group than I expected, and how about those Americans? No, they didn't look great, but they were hard-working and clutch, and that was fun to watch. The match against Algeria will be the one that is remembered but the comeback against Slovenia was just as big. People may not quite fathom how impressive it is that the U.S. won its group, particularly a group that features England, but it's enormous. England squeaked in and wasn't nearly as good as I thought it would be. It just goes to show how important it is to have a good keeper (how can England not have one top-flight keeper? Not one?). Slovenia was a solid side and maybe deserved to move forward. Maybe in four years. Algeria was Algeria, combative, not particularly good, not particularly bad, not good enough.

Group D
What I predicted: 1. Germany; 2. Serbia; 3. Australia; 4. Ghana
What happened: 1. Germany; 2. Ghana; 3. Australia; 4. Serbia
What was I thinking?: Germany was clearly the class of this group, and that was predictable from the start. The Germans are just a good, balanced team that has attacked well (Mesut Ozil is really good) and defends strong (though it can get caught out of position from time to time). As always, it's clearly a threat to go a long way. Serbia must be disappointed, though, after beating Germany only to finish last in the group. Some predicted Serbia could be the group winner so to finish in the basemen has to be quite a blow. But I'm glad I was wrong, because it wasn't that exciting a team. Australia I got right, but I'm surprised it recovered from the 4-0 shallacking it took from Germany in the opener. What happened there? The Australians have to be disappointed as well, after returning the bulk of the 2006 team that made it out of group play. I didn't buy into the Ghana hype but I was clearly wrong, as this is a fun, exciting team with great speed that attacks well. I thought this would be a disasterous tourney for Ghana but instead, it's the only African nation still alive, which is both a disappointment and says a lot for Ghana.

Group E
What I predicted: 1. Netherlands; 2. Cameroon; 3. Denmark; 4. Japan
What happened: 1. Netherlands; 2. Japan; 3. Denmark; 4. Cameroon
What was I thinking?: There was no way Netherlands wasn't going to win this group, and it was never seriously challenged. There's two reasons for that. First, this didn't turn out to be a very good group. Second, Netherlands is really good. As always, this side attacks and is dangerous on offense, but the midfield was stronger than I thought defensively. This is definitely a team to reckon with. Cameroon was a big disappointment, as I thought it would show much better but was in over its head. Denmark finished where I thought, almost getting through but not quite, and not doing a lot to make anyone outside of Denmark take notice. Japan is the real story, as I thought this would be a team that was out of its league but instead it simply outworked Japan and Cameroon and showed some real flashes of greatness on offense. This could turn out to be a dangerous team. With South Korea and Japan advancing while playing away from Asia, this could be a real breakthrough for that region.

Group F
What I predicted: 1. Italy; 2. Paraguay; 3. Slovakia; 4. New Zealand
What happened: 1. Paraguay; 2. Slovakia; 3. New Zealand; 4. Italy
What was I thinking?: From top to bottom, probably the most surprising group in the first round. There isn't a person out there - no you didn't, liar - that thought Italy fail to advance, much less finish last. Yes, this was an old team that probably wasn't going to win it all again, but this was still a strong team that was the clear group favorite. I mean, this was a weak group! So to finish last, wow, we're going to see some major changes for that side, and fast. Instead, Paraguay took advantage and just played well. Justo Villar was outstanding at keeper and the team just played steady and earned the group win. Slovakia, my new favorite team thanks to the Sounders, was the Cinderella story. This is its first World Cup appearance and early on looked over its head but just played steady and then pulled off the shocker against Italy. This team may not go any further but just wait four years. New Zealand, to me, was one of the real stories of the tournament. I thought this was by far. ...by far. ...the worst team in the entire tournament and probably wouldn't even score. I mean, this team only has a couple of really, truly pro soccer players, and I mean that literally. But they just kept tying, and that's great! Good for them. I hope this leads to some added interest in soccer for New Zealand.

Group G
What I predicted: 1. Brazil; 2. Portugal; 3. Ivory Coast; 4. North Korea
What happened: 1. Brazil; 2. Portugal; 3. Ivory Coast; 4. North Korea
What was I thinking?: The one group I got entirely correct. It wasn't that hard. It was clear Brazil would win the group, and it did. This team is dynamite. It defends, it attacks with its usual style, has an excellent keeper and plays with more confidence than any two teams combined. It's the clear favorite, sorry Spain. It was also obvious before the tourney, and even moreso during the tournament, that North Korea was the worst team in the Group of Death. This just wasn't a good team, and there's probably plenty of countries not in South Africa thinking, "What the heck?" So it came down to Portugal and Ivory Coast. Outside of embarrasing North Korea 7-0, Portugal wasn't that impressive, and took diving to a new level. I mean, they went down every time anyone even looked at them. Too bad, too, because there's obviously talent. Ivory Coast missed a fully-healthy Didier Drogba - though it was nice to see him out there, and he showed some real heart - and really, what it came down to is one team bullied the group weakling more than the other, so that team moved on.

Group H
What I predicted: 1. Spain; 2. Switzerland; 3. Chile; 4. Honduras
What happened: 1. Spain; 2. Chile; 3. Switzerland; 4. Honduras
What was I thinking?: The one prediction I'm really happy I got wrong. I thought that Chile's defense and youth would be exposed and while it would be close, it wouldn't quite make it through. I was wrong. The defense was outstanding for most of group play despite usually only having three guys in the back. It made up for it with some of the most impressive attacking in the field, led by Alexis Sanchez, and was one of the most impressive teams in the tournament, despite the loss to Spain. Speaking of Spain, what a shocker it opened up with. But talent won out eventually and there's no questioning this team's talent. But Switzerland did everyone else a favor by showing that Spain is beatable and can't just show up and be crowned. Do you realize how close we came to a Brazil-Spain Sweet 16 match? What a surprise that would have been. Switzerland got great play from its keeper but didn't have too much else, which is good news for the Sounders, who will get Blaise Nkufo sooner rather than later. Honduras had some supporters early on but just didn't have enough talent to keep up with the three other teams in the group.

So, 10 out of my 16 picks are moving on, which isn't that good of a percentage. But Chile and Slovakia are moving on and the United States actually won its group, so I'm not complaining. It should be a fun run to the end!